Volume One, Chapter Twenty-Three: The Twin Fish Grotto

Without waiting for Yibing to set it down, the turtle, unable to contain itself, leapt down in haste. There was a sharp “smack” as it hit the ground, lying motionless.

Everyone was startled, but Meinong lowered her head and scolded anxiously, “Hey! What kind of trick is this? If you don’t move, I’ll kick you down the mountain!” Despite her words, she was worried inside—could this really be a spirit turtle, knocked senseless by a mere fall?

A moment passed and still, it did not move. The plump girl quickly crouched and nudged the turtle gently. “Hey, Turtle Brother, don’t scare us! Are you alright?” Her voice trembled with urgency.

Before she finished speaking, there was a muffled “thud.” Suddenly, Turtle Brother expanded dozens of times. Had they not dodged quickly, they would have been knocked off the mountain.

“Hey, you wretched turtle! Are you trying to scare us to death?” Hanyu cursed furiously. Despite this, all were dumbfounded—a small turtle had grown as large as a carriage.

“Heh heh… It’s been too long; I seem to have forgotten some of my spells…” The turtle’s embarrassment was almost palpable as its head turned a deeper green.

“Then say something! We thought the divine turtle had died from that fall!” Hanyu couldn’t help but burst into laughter.

“Divine Turtle? Hmm, not a bad name!” The turtle rolled its eyes with satisfaction.

“Turtle Brother, let’s set off,” Yibing hurriedly stepped forward and saluted. Only then did the turtle turn its head. “Well then, climb aboard!” At this, everyone paused in surprise. Meinong was the first to leap onto its back, stamping her feet as she landed, but the turtle did not react at all. Meinong pursed her lips in mild annoyance.

Once all four were atop its shell, the turtle finally began to move, but its pace was slower than if they’d walked themselves.

“Hey! Divine Turtle, maybe we should walk after all?” Hanyu, knowing how it liked the title, spoke sweetly.

“Ha ha, don’t be impatient! Just finding my balance… in a moment!” Turtle Brother was so happy that snot bubbles nearly formed.

True to its word, the turtle picked up speed, and soon was galloping like a swift steed, racing through the grasslands and forest. Just as they thought that was the limit, it suddenly soared into the air, its four legs flapping like wings.

“Wow, a flying turtle!” Meinong’s mouth dropped open in astonishment. The turtle immediately tilted to the side, nearly tossing everyone off.

“Divine Turtle—!” The turtle craned its neck around, agitated.

“Divine Turtle! You’re the Divine Turtle! Fly properly, fly properly, oh…” Meinong hastened to soothe the flustered turtle. Though it no longer twisted its head, it was clearly still angry, for its shell rose and fell with its rapid breaths. Nonetheless, the Divine Turtle’s flight was swift and steady. Perhaps from being out of practice, it swooped up and down, sometimes gliding, sometimes banking, changing poses constantly as they traveled.

“Hey, everyone hold tight! Heh, it’s been ages since I tried this…” The Divine Turtle said slyly. Before anyone could react, it performed a sudden one-hundred-eighty-degree roll in midair! In an instant, the four of them were plunging headfirst toward the ground, but before they could cry out, the turtle flipped again, catching them squarely on its back.

“You wretched turtle! You nearly scared me to death!” Meinong pounded its shell in fury. Even the usually composed Hanyu raised her jade pestle, and if not for the plump girl restraining her, she would have struck the turtle.

“Ha ha ha ha…” The Divine Turtle shook with laughter.

“Turtle Brother…” Yibing’s round face had turned pale.

“Hey, Fatty! I wasn’t talking to you!” Hanyu shot a glance at the plump girl. “Take out the divine iron—turn it into a rope and tie it around its neck!”

“No, no, no…” The Divine Turtle instantly retracted its head into its shell. At once, balance was lost and they began plummeting.

“Turtle Brother, stop fooling around! We won’t tie you up!” Yibing shouted in terror.

“You promise? You really promise?” Only then did the turtle steady itself, anxiously twisting its head. It was clearly wary of the divine iron.

“Ha, frightened now, aren’t you?” Hanyu couldn’t help but laugh.

“You turtle! You didn’t even make a sound…” Seeing it like this, Meinong’s anger vanished.

“I told you not to move!” the Divine Turtle protested, aggrieved. Seeing no one responded, it muttered in embarrassment, “Heh, it’s just been so long since I flew—I couldn’t resist!”

After that, everyone settled down. Guided by Meinong, it took less than a quarter hour before they saw a mountain ahead, shrouded in demonic energy and mist. Slowly, a black peak emerged from the haze.

“There it is! Blackstone Peak!” Meinong pointed urgently at a cave halfway up the mountain, its entrance faintly visible. Above the doorway, the words “Twin Fish Grotto” were inscribed.

The Divine Turtle dove toward the cave, but when it was nearly a hundred feet away, it veered right and landed slowly in a secluded spot on the mountain’s side. The moment it touched down, it shrank again to palm size. Yibing bent to pick it up, but it raised a foreleg and waved frantically. “No need, no need! I’ll wait outside!” And with that, it darted into the undergrowth.

“That fellow is sly!” Meinong couldn’t help but mock. Seeing Yibing’s puzzled face, Hanyu laughed, “It’s afraid that if we fail, it’ll be caught too, so it’s safer to wait outside!”

“Oh!” Only then did Yibing understand, privately marveling at Turtle Brother’s cunning.

After a brief rest, the four decided that Meinong and Hanyu would disguise themselves and enter the grotto, while Yibing and the plump girl waited outside to assist if needed. Though Hanyu was most unwilling, she let Meinong fuss over her for quite a while. The once pure and lovely beauty was transformed into a seductive little demon.

“Hey, why the frown? This is the only way to sneak in!” Meinong tried to comfort Hanyu, who glared but said nothing. Meinong also disguised herself, letting her long hair cover half her face in case she was recognized by any familiar demons.

Just as they approached the cave, a demon on duty shouted, “Who goes there?” Meinong didn’t answer but approached with a coquettish smile, while Hanyu gripped her jade pestle behind her back.

“Oh! You startled me, my heart’s still pounding!” Meinong reached out and gently pushed the little demon, who became dizzy and tongue-tied from nervousness.

“The young master is celebrating, invited me here, and this is how you greet guests?” Meinong pouted, feigning annoyance in a sweet voice.

“No, I…” The demon tried to speak, but Meinong pressed a finger to his lips.

“Is the young master in the main hall or the bedchamber? I’ll go surprise him!” With that, Meinong walked into the cave. Hanyu, dumbfounded, hurried after her.

“…the main hall…” The little demon, already bewitched, stared after Meinong’s swaying, fox-tailed figure.

“Stop wagging your tail!” Hanyu, following behind, blushed furiously.

“I won’t! You should show your rabbit tail and wag it too!” Meinong retorted. Hanyu was so irritated she nearly stepped on her tail.

Though Meinong had only been here twice, she already knew the layout by heart. She went straight toward the main hall. Peeking inside, they saw the hall festooned with lanterns and filled with guests—demons of all kinds had gathered to congratulate the groom. The Jade-Faced Gentleman sat atop an ivory couch, toasting and feasting with the crowd.

“Let’s rescue the prisoners first, then the bride!” Meinong glanced at Hanyu, who nodded and followed closely.

They approached the prison, where a male and female demon were flirting at the entrance. Meinong frowned. “Oh! Why did you push me?” Hanyu looked bewildered as Meinong stumbled, falling straight into the male demon’s arms and draping her leg over his waist. “Oh my…”

“Heh heh!” The male demon ogled Meinong’s bare leg, nearly drooling.

“…you…” The female demon stomped her foot in fury, but the male demon couldn’t tear his eyes from Meinong. “Careful, miss! A fall could be unfortunate.”

“Thanks to you…” Meinong gave his chest a gentle push. “The young master said there are many men locked up here. We were told to pick a few for yin-yang cultivation, but I can’t find any.” The male demon started. “Pick them?” Meinong’s brow furrowed. “Maybe I’ll pick you instead?” The male demon nodded eagerly. The female demon, fuming, slapped him hard.

“Oh, so you dare strike your own man!” Meinong feigned concern, caressing the back of his head. Seeing the male demon so enraptured, the female could bear it no longer—she tossed her hair and stormed off.

“My, your little sweetheart is angry. So, shall we pick or not?” Meinong wrapped an arm around his neck. The demon shivered as if chilled to the bone and suddenly came to his senses, hurriedly pushing Meinong away. “No, no! There are plenty of good ones inside. Please, help yourself…”

“Are you sure you won’t regret it?” Meinong lifted her skirt flirtatiously, but the male demon shook his head like a rattle-drum, thinking, “Lucky I didn’t fall for her tricks, or I’d be doomed!”

Hanyu, already blushing to the roots of her hair, could bear it no more. She raised her pestle and knocked the demon out cold. “Shameless hussy, enough already!” Meinong paid her no heed, bending down to take the keys from his waist.

“I wonder which one I should pick first?” Meinong jingled the keys, scrutinizing the prisoners within. All the men were bound and cowered with heads bowed, except Jin Guishan, who met Meinong’s gaze directly. She couldn’t help but admire him—no wonder he was the senior disciple.

“You fox demon, what are you up to?” Jin Guishan had already recognized the seven-tailed fox.

“What am I up to? Why, to absorb your essence and strengthen my true form!” Meinong approached the cell with a mischievous grin.

“Enough nonsense! Hurry and let them out!” Hanyu snatched the keys and unlocked the cell.

“You…” The prisoners stared in disbelief. Wasn’t this the traitor?

“Don’t listen to her! Your junior sister sent us to save you—quickly, now!” Hanyu guarded the door, keeping watch. Though Jin Guishan was doubtful, seeing Meinong untie him and then help the others, he decided to trust her for now. He hurried to untie Qi Yuanxiao. “Take care of the others and get out. I’ll go save Junior Sister He!” With that, he dashed for the door.

“Hey! Are you mad?” Meinong grabbed him back. “If you alert the Jade-Faced Gentleman, no one will escape!” Her words silenced Jin Guishan at once.

“You all go ahead! The two fat ones are outside. I’ll go with… her to save your junior sister. Even if we’re discovered, we can use the chaos to slip away!” Hanyu explained quickly. Jin Guishan saw the sense in her words and stopped insisting.

Once everyone was untied, Meinong led them carefully toward the exit. Any minor demons they encountered were quickly dealt with. As they neared the main hall, Qi Yuanxiao noticed their weapons stored in a side cave. At this, everyone’s morale soared—they were ready to fight for their honor.

“Rescuing your junior sister comes first; revenge can wait!” Hanyu reminded Jin Guishan, who nodded and kept everyone calm. Once the group slipped past the main hall, Meinong and Hanyu halted.

“Straight ahead is the exit! We’ll go rescue your junior sister now—try not to alert anyone!” With that, Meinong turned to leave.

“Wait!... Miss, thank you!” Jin Guishan bowed deeply.

“Miss? Heh, thank me properly when you’re out!” Meinong winked at him, leaving Jin Guishan embarrassed and coughing awkwardly.

To reach the Jade-Faced Gentleman’s chamber, they had to cross the main hall. Luckily, little demons carrying drinks and dishes were coming and going. Meinong and Hanyu stopped one group, offering to help. Faced with two beauties, the demons were all too eager for their assistance—in fact, they would have gladly switched roles.

Thus, Meinong and Hanyu entered the hall, balancing trays and exchanging playful banter, all the while moving cautiously.

By then, the Jade-Faced Gentleman was already slumped on his ivory couch, drunkenly frolicking with a bevy of demonesses. After setting down their trays, Meinong and Hanyu hurried through the hall. The entire passage to the bedchamber was adorned for the wedding—lanterns everywhere, double happiness characters pasted on the walls, silver lamps lighting the way, and a long red carpet rolled out along the floor.

“This little girl’s wedding is certainly extravagant!” Meinong couldn’t help but laugh. Hanyu ignored her, wary and alert to their surroundings.